5 Things Dad's Shoud Know

There comes a time, whether you are married or in a relationship with a man, that you will want to have children with him. 

You find qualities in this man that you can see him sharing with a child you both brought into the world. You see a side of this man that you thought you have never seen before and think to yourself, "this is the man I want to be connected with forever" until forever comes along.

Before you know it happily ever after isn't so happy. The stress of bringing a child into the world along with the idea of being responsible can scare anyone. The relationship between you and the Father is no longer what it used to be. The qualities he once had, you no longer see in him or vise versa. Many relationships don't even occur between the biological parents because of one reason or another. This is not to say it happens to all relationships, but it is possible which can affect how you co-parent.

We have compiled a list of 5 things Dad's need to know:

1. Children are not messengers. So please stop treating them as such, even if they are teenagers there is no reason they need to discuss adult matters regarding our current custody arrangement.
2.  If we can't speak respectfully to each other, we don't need to talk. It is during those times that we should be emailing with each other. 
3. We shouldn't have to communicate with your current lady friend. We never agreed to co-parent with her so please do not force it to happen.
4. Do not allow yourself or your current lady friend to speak negatively about me in front of the children. I will give you the same courtesy whether you do this or not.
5. Court is not always the answer. Threatening court or constantly taking me to court will never make for a civil co-parenting relationship.

Now these are just the basics broken down for those who believe they are dealing with a high conflict person. Many times a parent is doing what he/she knows how to do whether you are together or not. Once the romantic relationship ends, that's when stress levels begin to rise because each party is trying to do what they think is best for the children. If you deal with a narcissist or a person who was diagnosed mental health disorder, they are not high conflict because they disagree with your choices as a parent or step parent.

Being parent is always hard and we will always doubt or second guess ourselves. Remember, you cannot control the reaction  or emotions of others but you can control your reactions and emotions.